Flaps = aerodynamic device for increasing the effective angle of incidence of the wing. Provides more lift at higher drag, allowing you to fly more slowly.
Aileron = aerodynamic device for increasing and decreasing the effective angle of incidence of each wing, thereby inducing roll.
Flaperon = combination of the two. The 'ailerons' work as normal, but the flap lever moves them both down simultaneously - having the same effect as flaps.
On the BB, the couterweights of the ailerons extend so far forward that if you take full flap, you will not have much aileron control (the couterweights press up against the underside of the wing). This can catch out the unwary, so many BB pilots just ignore the flaps, and land a little faster.
If it adjusts itself during flight, something is very wrong. Fix it. If a pax adjusts it during flight (or plays with any aerodynamic controls without your permission), open the door, and boot them out

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-justin