When to know its time to quit your dream

[D2O]

After reading a few related threads and after considering my dilemma, I thought I'd pose this question, as I feel I'm at a crossroad
So, when do you have to decide its time to pack it all in and realize that dreams & reality don't always mix, despite the level of motivation?

I persued my dream of flying despite being in financial difficulty, and after a long one and a half years, finally got my license.
I purchased a plane, but unknown to me, life was going to deal me with several blows.

Firstly the house renovations were going to go drastically over budget, followed by a driver not paying attention resulting in my paid off car being written off, then insurance paying book value that wasn't going to cover the costs of another car. My thoughts? Sell the plane initially, but then I realized if I did, I would probably never be able to buy another one again, so I kept it. I then got myself into more debt by buying a car, and using the insurance money as a deposit. Sounds great, right? Well, just after 1 month, and nothing other than a 1 month warrantee, the car's engine decides to seize. That took me 6 months and a small fortune to fix, and I got it back working fine - so I thought.

I get my license in October last year, but cannot fly my plane yet because I need to do a conversion to a Windlass first. I fly only once since getting my license, and not in my own plane. Finally, I get my conversion done, and my plane is now ready. I take it out on my first flight in December, and what happens? I goose step the thing, and cause over R20 000's damage to it. To add insult to injury, my car's engine decides to seize again 2 days later. This time I can't afford to fix it, so now it stands. Now I don't have a plane or a car

I try and stay flying, but find I can't fly anymore. Either I'm too scared, or haven't been flying enough. Either way, I can't land properly. I've flown twice since the accident, with an instructor since December. I feel like I'm on hour 3 of my training! I can barely afford to hire & fly with and instructor already, and I feel that either I'm no good as a pilot and should just quit for the safely of others and my own, or I'm not getting enough flying hours & my license will lapse, meaning I've wasted my time and money on a dream I shouldn't have persued in the first place

Is it time for me to just hang up the headphones, sell the helmet, and move on to knitting sweaters?

[Aerosan]

Boeta hang in there

its not worth letting your licence laps- life is hard but let me tell you in a year or so this will be forgotten. I know some guys who fly on an absolute shoestring budget, plenty problems and somehow they always make it work. Space your hire and fly to every 3 months and fly an hour that should get you through

Im sure there is someone in here that will help, microlighters is the most helpfull bunch ever

DONT GIVE UP

[Koevoet]

Welcome to life, u had money to do rernovations, have a car, have a plane, so every thing was and is still good. U will get there again.

Every body in life get dealt some ups and downs, but that just makes us stronger and wiser, u will find a way to get past this.
The best way in life is to stand up and go forward, start with the important stuff, then the rest will fall in place.

Giving up results to nothing - like they say no pain no gain.

Like Aeroan said -don't give up

[salem]

Hi D20. You might think that things couldn't get any worse but think about it for a second. When you had a car accident, you could have been killed! When you 'goose-stepped' your aerie, you could have died! The fact that you are alive and you can talk about these incidents proves that things could have been a lot worse. In a few years time, you will probably be laughing at your previous bad luck. Remember that as long as you are healthy and you have two hands and a brain, all problems can be solved. Don't give up and don't hang up your headphones

[Blue Max]

Hi,
I dont know who your instructor was.
He should be able to give you honest advice as far as your flying ability goes.
If there was hesitation from his side that you were busy with a futile dream he should have failed you from the beginning.
If he is Honest and say that you have the potencial to go on and not quit the fly-ing dream. Then you should do that.
Then at all cost, irrespective of financial shit, you go on and persuit that dream. They call it tenacity. NEVER give up.
But......also in life ,
It is true that some people has more "Ball sence " than other.
If you are one of those who perhaps are nor ment to fly then accept that.
You also should have a fair idea if ""this fly-ing" thing is a bit difficult???
The lord has not made us all the same.
Some people has more talents than other.
Be not dishartened, cause surely you have other talents.
(One of them is the way you have constructed your letter and presented it without fear of humiliation.)
Your financial problem has nothing to do with whether you should keep persuing you dream.!!!

Many years ago when I was in deep, deep shit.
I was told by a very wise man that there are certain problems in life that only you, yourselve can solve and nobody else.
This sounds like one of them.
Good luck.
" Ook DIT sal verby gaan"!!!
After having read what Salem And Koevoet has said above I want to add this..: Many people in life has died hero.s cause they were persuing their dream.!!!
The choice is yours.

[D2O]

Thanks for the input guys.
salem is right. I should be lucky to be alive today, and I'm grateful for it.

I guess it comes down to 2 things:
1) Confidence / ability
2) Financial matters

Both are weighing heavily on my reasoning to quit my dream.
At the time I got my license (sorry, it was in September not October as stated in my origonal post), my test flight went very well. I even had a good first flight after I got my license (solo of course) in October, but when I work it out I've only flown that 1 hour on my own since my license in September. My conversion to a Windlass was 1 hour, and that was only in December, just days before my accident, followed by 2 hours with an instructor in January. So that's 1 hour in a month, followed by no flying in 2 months. My gut says I know how to do this, but the accident really took a knock on my confidence. I haven't flown enough at all, and I lose more confidence with each passing week I don't fly. Without money, I don't fly. Without flying, I lose confidence. Without confidence, I lose ability.

Overall I really do believe that my instructor would have stopped me if he felt I was unable to do this, and recalling the last few hours of my training and my flight test, I know I can do this. The question is, at what point is it no longer worth persuing? By flying so few hours, I'm putting myself and others at risk. In order to keep my flying hours up, I need to spend money I do not have. Thus, I'm at a crossroads. I don't really have much choice.

How big a mountain is it to climb if my license lapses? Do I have to start over? How many hours do I need to do to get my license again?

[RV4ker (RIP)]

Never quit, even if you have to sell aerie. Partnerships, hire and fly etc are all options.

You need minimal hrs to keep license and it easier than trying to get legal again.

Keep the faith.....

[D2O]

Thanks again guys. The feedback is really helping put things into a different perspective.
I can't ask these kind of questions anywhere else, as we all share this passion called flying, and frankly anyone who does not know flying would just give me simple advice of changing hobbies!

Blue Max, you are right. I should be persuing my dream as far as I can, and I'm not done yet
Despite what crap life dishes out, I will persue this dream. Thanks all, I'll keep you posted.

[Sukkelaar]

D2O where do you fly from.

Maybe some airfield buddies can help out, for you to stay current

regards

[John Young]

Hi,

Trees don't grow to heaven, and
Roots don't grow to hell (but sometimes they try real hard).

Strongs

Regards
John N????B

[John Boucher]

D2O

Possibly everyone on this forum has gone through a torrid time one time or other or.... still going through it right now - I am not immune to this, others on the forum and neither are you! Your situation ain't unique by no means!

I think if we had to create a "Hoekie vir Eensames" the corner would be full of stories relating to yours. I have taken almost 4 years to get my Cheetah back in the air due to financial constraints brought on by a very expensive divorce, tried to keep certain aspects of my licence valid and finally it lapsed in last year. Circumstance has prevented me from renewing but that should change in the next couple of weeks and yet I strive to get my arse back in the skies!

My advice to you... hang in there for all it's worth! Don't relinquish that what you have striven for....

As for the problems with your flying - easy to resolve - you are obviously not flying enough for one... and also I don't know who your instructor is but maybe have some time in the air with a different instructor (with the issue discussed with you present one) Maybe there is just a simple part of the sequence that may be "approached" differently by an alternative instructor that assists you to snap the habit and turn them into greasers!

Good luck and don't hesitate to turn to your friends on the forum....

[Boet]

This February I have been flying aeroplanes for 40 years. It was not always easy to keep on doing it thru drought, disease and divorce, and raising kids, and keeping out of shit financially. Took some ingenious plans sometimes to keep the aeroplane aloft and the pure simple joy of flying alive. Now looking back: Would I have it any other way? NO WAY. Life owes you nuttin, and becomes what you make of it. Hang in there mate, do your best, and keep the dream alive.

[Bundy]

Hi D2O,

I am sorry about the difficult times that have fallen upon you. I wish you all the best of luck and hope you can pull yourself out of the muck again.

To answer your question, only you can answer that for yourself Im afraid. From what you have shared with us, I think your biggest problem is that you are unable to fly often enough. It is amazing how "rusty" the skills get when there are long gaps in the flying schedule. Last year, two hours after going solo during my training, my instructor groundlooped with another student and I was officially grounded for 3 months before the school could replace the plane. It took me another 5 hours dual before I could fly solo again. (And added a couple grand to the training cost )

Even now after qualifiying, I am unable to buy my own plane due to various other commitments, family, business etc. I hire and fly like many others around and look forward to eventually being in a position to change that.

We all have our own reasons for flying. Some are adrenaline junkies, some are after that true sense of freedom you can only get while at the controls of an aircraft. The tone of your message makes me sense that you are allready feeling that sense of loss you will have if you let your license lapse. These post crash nerves you are experiencing will pass as you build confidence again... but only if you stay current.

My advice to you is the same as a friend of mine who fell into similar circumstances. Please dont laugh guys because it really helped him! I called it the "cookie jar" method. Every day after work he put all the silver coins in his wallet into a jar. His wife even did it after a while! At the end of the month, you will be amazed how much collects in there. It will almost certainly be enough for you to do at least a hour a month.

Bottom line D2O, we all go through tough times, life will always throw curveballs at us and that will never change. The only thing we can change, is how we react to them. I wish you all the best mate.

[Tumbleweed]

Witnessed a newby bounce his trike into a fence. As we rush to ask if he's OK, everyone, as they arrive say,

"Ag thats F$%k all, mine was worse"

"It's nothing, you should have seen mine"

"Nevermind, it can be repaired. It looked k@k anyway. Mine was a right- off"

The poor oke says " Have anyone one of you never had an oopsie?"

"No- ha ha."

Point is, all the high milers are rated on their current flying ability and experience and not how they got there or how long it took them awesome pilots.

Another observation.

At our airfield, getting together for doppies, we mingle amongst diverse com pilots, crop sprayers, serious long distance flyers, cabbage patch flippers and home builders spending ten years on a project which looks like a piece of sh$!t, but to him, being lovingly assembled bolt and lap as his budget and time allows, his pride and passion.

At any oppertunity, the spare seats are taken up, sharing radio work and navs and any outing is a jol.

Bum some flips in a trike, fixed wing and stay in the loop. As your confidence grows while you interact, you'll see help and oppertunities develop.

[fransstrydom]

D20,
I really feel for you.Seems like you are at a all time low in your life and it manifests in your
dream of flying.Confidence walk out the back door when trouble decides its your turn.Selling
your plane wont fix that,it may only fix a small problem for a very short time.
Have you considered all your options?It may be possible to rent your aircraft to a school,let
them pay for the insurance and maintenance and maybe get some money back,even if you
can fly only for one hour per week.Fly with a friend as a passenger for a while,just for the sheer
joy and enthusiasm to get your mojo back.Mabe you can consider a partner and share the
expences. Another option might be to lay of flying for a while,if your aircraft is not costing
anything at the moment,untill your situation changes,but keep current.
Your willingnes to talk about this is very mature,and you are discovering you will get more
support from fellow aviators than you could ever have imagined.Use them,pick up your feet
and let the current carry you for a while.Where do you fly from?Give me a call and we
can go for a flip in my Gyro.
franss
Proud Sycamore Owner 083 382 1627
Rhino Park
ZU-CCN