Friday funnee

[Sad-Ham]

After 35 years of marriage, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said:
"Honey, 35 years ago we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, we slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot and sexy 19 year-old gal. Now I have a R4.5 million home, a R2.5 million plane, a R500 thousand car, a big bed and plasma screen TV, but I am sleeping with a 54 year-old woman. It seems to me that you are not holding up your side of the bargain.”

My wife is a very reasonable woman.

She told me to go out and find a hot, 19 year-old gal.
Then she said she would soon make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV.

Aren't older women great?

They really know how to solve one’s mid-life crisis.

[MILO]

An old man & his nagging wife went to Jerusalem on holiday. While there his wife passed away. The undertaker advised they could bury her in the holy land for $150, or ship her home for $5000. The man though about it for a while then said he wants her shipped home. Surprised the undertakers asked why spend $5000 when you can bury her here in the holy land for $150.
The husband replied “ Many years ago they buried a man here, and after 3 days he rose from the dead. I am not prepared to take that chance.”