Microlighters

A GUY SAYS TO HIS WIFE: "Darling, what would you do if I said I've won the lottery?"

Wife replies: "I'd take half then leave you."

The Guy says: "Excellent! I had three numbers and won Ten Dollars. Here's five...now f$%^-off!

Husband says"Jeez, where'd you get that nice jacket?"

"Won it with the lotto ticket"

"And what about the new car?"

"Oh, just lucky with my lotto ticket. I'm going out soon, won't you run my bath?"

She notices he 's only filled an inch of water in the tub and asks"What the hell. why such little water?"

"Dont want to wet the lotto ticket"