Ensure you are legal !

[RV4ker (RIP)]

Does anybody actually fly with their license on them all the time? When I was renting I did as all doc's were in 1 briefcase, but now I fly different aeries and only take license when I go international flight or to FALA

[gertcoetzee]

There is currently a discussion regarding documentation you need legally on your microlight on the SAMicro forum as well. Although it seems that the correct answer is

Exemptions

96.03.2 Notwithstanding the provisions of Regulation 91.03.1, a person may operate an amateur-built or production-built aircraft, including a microlight aeroplane, while conducting flight training or in a commercial air transport operation without carrying on board any of the documents prescribed in the foregoing regulation should such carriage not be safely or practically possible.

The best answer to this lunacy is (however, methinks the marbles of the author is also somewhat scattered over Transvaal)

Peter,

You are having us on. I would need to employ a bloody librarian if I was to keep all that documentation in my plane. It would also be a fire hazard as so much paper has a tendency towards spontaneous combustion.

A LIST OF VISUAL SIGNALS FOR INTERCEPTING AIRCRAFT???? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? I have never heard of this !! But I do have a few very effective visual signals that I will use at the drop of a helmet if one of these okes wants to intercept me. He can shove his nose in my panier bag and if it smells of perlemoen then he can arrest me. In fact, all he will smell is fresh vomit from the last oke that flew with me. And anyway, I carry my ganja in my ballistic chute - it makes me go higher when I deploy it - and he will never find it there because the handle says "pull only in case of emergency".

You gotta be having us on. I dont believe it. Most cops under the rank of Colonel cant read a warrant of arrest never mind an ICASA radio licence. If I photocopy and laminate a recipe for quiche the oke wont know the difference.

And my domestic is scared of heights so I never do domestic flights.

As pilot in command of an aircraft I have the powers to arrest and detain any person or persons who interfere with the safe progress of the flight. I will therefore arrest anyone looking for my radio licence. I am also ( by the powers vested in me as flight commander) an occifer of the piece and as such will marry any police women that complies to my specifications concerning mass and balance, noise level and service record ( manual or otherwise).

And also, an authority to fly is issued by the pilot's wife. Don't argue. God made women, not me. If the cops dont like this they can talk to my ex-wife. Or they can go escourt Cash-in-transit vans - I would recommend the latter. My one has split and gone to England to sign up for service in Iraq and my attorney, who was, until her departure, on a witness protection programme, phoned me from his unlisted number to say that I no longer need her authority for anything.

And then again, just because an oke describes his position in such detail and at such length that at the end of it you stand up on your seat in mid air and start singing hyms of thanks, does not mean that he is a radio station. He therefore does not need a broadcasters licence. And anyway, the definition of an aircraft radio is "a thing wot transmits and receives shouting" and 99% of trike radios are not designed to do this at all. They are mostly back-up rev counters so that if your rev counter fails you press transmit and all the other okes can hear from the whining and crackling whether or not you have cramp in your throtte foot and they can give you "visual signals" if they happen to be nearby.

My biggest concern is the bird guano on my wing. It is high in phosphates and as such my wing could be deemed to be a flying bomb by the CAA. I tried to assassinate the shitting bird by doing low flyby's through the hangar but to no avail. Maybe the cops could ask the bird for its documentation. Yeah!! Why must I, as a human being (my wife disputed this until she realised that the court cannot order a bastard dog to pay maintenance) who flies slower and more carefully than most birds (I dont land in trees if I can help it) need all this paper and yet no attempt is made to regulate birds. This is one for the Constitutional Court. I have less rights than an animal!!

Anyway, dem cops wont find my airfield. It looks like ground zero, Nagasaki Airport, 1945. There is a building with no roof. Toilets with no bog roll. Collapsed fences. The runways are used by meercats as excavation sites. The windsock is linked to a sophisticated electronic device that sets off a siren when the wind sock begins to move at which point all pilots are required to evacuate the field immediately. So after 7am the cops will find nothing there except a shitting bird with no paper work.

My recommendation is, in the event that you are approached by a police man wishing to scrutinise your paperwork is to show him a note from the Governor of the Reserve Bank and explain that aforementioned note is your authority to do anything. Whilst the Reserve Bank Governor carries a lot of clout, in the event that an argument ensues as to how many of these notes you are required to hand over for inspection, I would then suggest that you deny that the machine in question is an aircraft. Explain to the officer that everyone knows that planes have props in the front but your trike has the prop at the back and clearly a plane cannot fly backwards otherwise it would not be able to go to the ovasies but instead would fly backwards to the Antartic. If he persists, explain that the thing is a mobile borehole pump and the awning on top is used to give shade to the operator and protect from the rain. Then show him the boreholes along runway 05/23 and ask him to shoot any meerkat that sticks its head out of one. Show him the pull-start and ask him if he has ever seen a boeing with a pull start.

Anyway, I dont believe you. And anyway, there is an oke at my airfield who looks like mad max and has done jail time. In fact even his name is "J ". You dont mes with this oke. Sometimes "his old buddies from college" come over with their tattoe's and stuff and tune me "wie's j !!" and I pretend I only speak Latin, point to his hangar and then promptly leave the field for the day. Now he will fix things for you if it gets bad with the cops. There are some trenches waiting to be filled with concrete by the Panorama "building manager" (who is a close associate of J) and trike airfields are dangerous places and accidents do happen - ask the CAA.

Duif

[Microwave]

:D :D :D

I found that very entertaining indeed :D

[skybound®]

Exemptions

96.03.2 Notwithstanding the provisions of Regulation 91.03.1, a person may operate an amateur-built or production-built aircraft, including a microlight aeroplane, while conducting flight training or in a commercial air transport operation without carrying on board any of the documents prescribed in the foregoing regulation should such carriage not be safely or practically possible.

This is a bit subjective. Me thinks you may have a hard time convincing the oke that you cannot carry an A5 book in your panier. Especially after you have unpacked your sleeping bag, picnic basket, blow up mattress out of the panier. Even remember some guys in the ELN are carrying their diving kit with them.

[DieselFan]

There is currently a discussion regarding documentation you need legally on your microlight on the SAMicro forum as well. Although it seems that the correct answer is

had me in stiches!

[ACE]

:D :D :D

I found that very entertaining indeed :D

Wooo Hooo - well said. Had a good laugh :D :D

[Microwave]

The part I like best is:

My recommendation is, in the event that you are approached by a police man wishing to scrutinise your paperwork is to show him a note from the Governor of the Reserve Bank and explain that aforementioned note is your authority to do anything.

This is a big hoot....and probably not far from the truth....

Its easy then, you only need one or two small documents in your plane at most, and these are quite easy to carry with you in any plane :D

[Aerosan]

[The best answer to this lunacy is (however, methinks the marbles of the author is also somewhat scattered over Transvaal)
] I would prefer this type of posting done somewhare else!!! Because of this post I am now in deeeeep kaka.

I hosed myself and fell off the chair while I was supposed to be working! I couldnt even hold my pose for long enough to bs the boss. lucky for me he started reading as well and now he is also in stiches!! :D :D

keep it up [/code]

[Morph]

Clever man,

now you will of course take him to all the unused strips

[Aerosan]

Howcome he doesnt know what the intentions of his boss is? I hope private strips stay just that- private

[MVT]

Waveflyer – nearly … as long as ….

• You don’t fly
• You don’t own a gun
• You don’t resist when being mugged
• You don’t talk back to hijackers
• You don’t argue when traffic police seek bribes
• You don’t question how come convicted murderers are released on R 1,000 bail
• You don’t expect the police to appear within 8 hours of a genuine emergency
• You don’t question the government’s anti-tobacco effort in lieu of other things
• You don’t question why all 16 seat vehicles have right of way
• You don’t question why you need many big dogs and serious security systems
• You don’t question why the mayor has 24 personal security officers
• You don’t etc. etc.
• And then you pay your taxes, VAT, rates, levies, tariffs, etc. etc

Regards

You forgot paying your TV License. That's jail time right there!

Gert - that's one of the funniest posts I've ever read!