Elke hond kry sy dag

[Louis Cole]

Ek ry nou die dag RAASA toe om my lisensie te hernu, toe 'n verkeersman my stop en se dat ek nie heeltemal tot stilstand gekom het by 'n stopstraat nie. Toe hy my vertel dat dit my R1250 gaan kos en dat hy dors is, kry ek hond se gedagtes en besluit toe om die blinde sambok te beproef. Ek se toe dat as 'n oud-Polisieman besef ek dat ek moes gestop het en dat hy die kaartjie maar moet skryf. Ek vermoed dat ek raak geslaan het toe hy my amper om die nek val van vriendelikheid en se: "You were a Policeman? Once a Policeman, always a Policeman. Dog don't eat dog".Toe laat hy my gaan voordat ek vir hom 'n koeldrankie kan aanbied.

[nicow]

Mooi man

[Asterix]

Here in Limpopo, once you understand the mind of the traffic officer, you NEVER get fined. And you don't have to bribe.

I have been pulled over for speed 7 or 8 times since Jan 2013, on numerous spots between Polokwane and Louis Trichardt, Tzaneen, Giyani, Tohoyandou and Phalaborwa. going on avg 130 - 140 in 120 km zones.

The officer approaches, you smile big and say " how fast?" You then predict your speed - "Was it 134km/h?" as you pull your licence out and make small talk. He then tells then you: " No, 136km/h." You then get yourself into a relaxed mood, and tell him that you agree, and he must write the fine.

He then starts making small talk, trying to waste your time and get you anxious, waiting for a bribe. You make peace with the fact that you will be late for your appointment, and engage whole-heartedly into his small talk, and forget about time. You adapt your conversation, as you pick up on his "personality", and aim your conversation at the "Tor, binne in die dik kop op sy prop, besig om toue te trek." Get him of the prop - the rest is easy. From here on the Tor is trying to avoid drowning. And you are in control of the situation.

After about ten minutes of fraternising, he realises that he will not be bribed, and tell you to enjoy your day, hands you back your licence, and tells you to drive safely. You then thank him, pull away as fast as you can, throwing up as much dust and rocks as you can, and get back to 140 km/h as quickly as you can.

His "brain" works like this:

a. Extract a bribe by wasting your time, or antagonize you to the point where he can arrest you;
b. Once it is evident that he will actually have to write a fine without personal financial gain, you are told to go. He does not want to waste further time on you - he is missing out on other potential "payers", driving by;
c. He has no interest in enforcing the law - he is there for self-enrichment. The mere thought of having to actually do his duty and work a bit, issue a fine, what with all the spelling, writing and thinking, hurts his head. This is what you leverage on - his incompetence to actually do his job.

I drive as fast as I want to in Limpopo. Once in a while, it costs me ten minutes - but NO money, ever, be that through a bribe or a fine.

Jy moet net verstaan hoe werk 'n krans atleet se ou bietjie breinselle.

NS: During November last year this approach didn't work, on the road to Burgersfort. The krans atleet actually DID start writing out the fine. After 30 minutes of spelling out to him everything from "Mister" to "PO Box", right through the difficulty of spelling my name and ID number, I left the scene with a R 400 fine. As I took the fine from his hands I could see that his headache was already in an advanced stage. Die Tor het DIEP geduik. Later that day, I checked the fine, verifying payment date and court date: - and wouldn't you know? The court date - FELL ON A SUNDAY!

Needless to say - The Clerk of the Court is STILL calling out my name every Sunday morning since then, all alone, and wondering what went wrong! Sy arme Tor probeer seker nou nog terugklim op die prop..en uit- figure watter tou om volgende te trek sodat hy nie meer Sondae oggende my naam hoef te gaan uitroep in die gange van die hofsale nie.... Shame.

Kransatlete. Sometimes the incompetence is VERY beneficial!

[Wargames]

Hi Asterix,

Your sunday doesn't beat my court date...

2 weeks prior to the fine date!!

[Alkemac]

the next time one of these individuals approaches your car, and as they get to the window with the book out, and pen ready to write, tell them you want two hotdogs and a coke...